I Just Want You To Know Who I Am.

I made a song cover of Iris by Goo Goo Dolls last week. Well, it's pretty much related to my second post (Unrequited Love) plus, someone (a person from my theater company) decided to make use of it as his music for his contemporary dance in our school's dance company's concert tomorrow. I'm so flattered, and yet so devastated when I hear the song (and the hardest part is, it's my voice so I don't have the right not to assimilate. :D ). On the same event, I was invited to perform a song ("Listen to Your Heart" by DHT) and that song is sooo painful as much! (Emo alert! Emo alert!)

Haha Well, it's hard to be emotional. But it's harder not to feel any emotion at all! And besides, there's a weird pleasure in crying. Haha!

As a theater actor, I must be soulful. I must experience every emotion I can feel. Devour all new emotions, and remember old ones. I need to get drowned in all of my emotions to be able to perform and act sensibly and effectively. Same goes with my singing. And dancing. And drawing. Well, I really need emotions to be able to perform tasks that make me feel happy and satisfied in life. Emotions are in fact useful, and it make life colorful. :) Though sometimes, people tend to feel these emotions negatively, causing drastic bad changes to themselves. Some get totally depressed and messed up, and worst, some kill themselves, WHICH IS NOT A GOOD IDEA AT ALL. Suicide is never a solution to one's problem.

Anyway, Let's go to the topic. "I Just Want You to Know Who I Am." This is a phrase from the song Iris by Goo Goo Dolls. In the song, that phrase means the singer wants to be seen or noticed or appreciated by the one he loves. And he can't do anything but to stare at her. and wait. wait until the girl would realize that he is there, loving her passionately. :) It's sweet. But as we look at the sad, tragic part of the singer's life, it's sooo heart-breaking. Being unnoticed is one of the worst tragic moment of life. It's painful not to be seen.

However, the song made me realize that people really needs attention. Well, some are overfilled with that kind of attitude that most of the time, they're irritating (ATTENTION SEEKERS! >:( haha ). The reality is, we all need attention. Even if sometimes we deny this fact, we all know that attention is a good stepping stone to building our confidence and exercising our ability to trust ourselves. That's why when we love a person, the first desire that would come to our mind is to be loved by that person back.

Well, it's not bad to dream of being loved back by the person you love, but some said that true love never seeks or expects anything in return. It's the hardest level to attain, when talking about different kinds of love, yet it is the most genuine one. I want to experience this kind of love. I just don't know how to. I think I'll search for it next time, then I'll post it right away for you. :)

Today, I realized that attention is a necessity. Just like what God wants us to do to Him. He wants us to seek Him all the time. To appreciate everything He does for our sake. To notice Him no matter how many distractions this life brings. Let's love Jesus Christ with all our heart. He is the most deserving person for our love. :) God bless everyone!